(The following is an addendum to the last paragraph of yesterday’s post about The Tree.)

The stone I found for Sage’s grave is special. I found it on the beach in Maine, and it was massive and black, very out of place, like us. I used “Beauty”, my old, rusted Jeep, to bring it back to our woods. It weighed 141lbs. Once at the trailhead, I put it in my seabag, which at the time was active duty.  It took me 15 hours over two days to carry it 5 miles, partially up hill, and get it to wear it needed to be.

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It’s supposed to storm today and I hope it comes soon. I came in a little late today because I got drunk last night, had a large General Tso’s chicken from the down the block (which almost killed me), and woke up feeling like shit. I did all that too myself, I put myself in that mood yesterday.

I’m here at the desk now, a little too hot, bags under my eyes, and thinking about all the work I should be doing. Looks like I missed a meeting that someone added to my cal without asking. I’m sure I’ll be hearing about that very soon, and not caring very much about it.

One thing about getting drunk when you’re in a heavy training cycle is that you drop lots of water with every drink and then over the course of the night. For training, that’s not good at all, and can take days to replenish. But one effect of rapid dehydration is that it thins your skin everywhere, and depending on how your physique is, that can make you look freakishly muscular, like the skin is being pulled back tightly over every part of your body. So that’s neat and freaky today.

I’ve been wearing white collar shirts lately, cycling through 4 pairs, mostly over jeans, of which I now also have 3 pairs that are work appropriate. One black, one dark blue, one lighter blue. If I add a blazer, it’s set. This has simplified my life considerably and I should have been doing this years ago. Also, a female told me I looked good in white collar shirts, so, here I am, like an idiot, now with 4 pairs of white collar shirts of different makes. I have Brooks Brothers, Express Men, J.Crew and Banana Republic. They all fit slightly differently. The Express one is sort of a stretchy fabric which makes me look kind of douchey because it’s tight on me now. It was already a little tight when I got it (for a wedding I think), and with the extra muscle now I’m probably really pushing it, but I like the collar it has, it’s a perfect size collar for me. The Brooks one fits the best overall and is probably the best fabric. It’s an $89 shirt, so the thing better last at least 2-3 years. The J.Crew one is the softest and is the one that needs ironing or super-power whipping by hand so it dries without wrinkles. The cotton of that shirt is so soft that if you whip it, it sounds like a flapping sail on a windy day. The thing I like about the Banana one is that it’s not long, unlike other dress shirts, so it can actually be worn without being tucked in and not look ridiculous. When it is tucked in, it doesn’t create a whole bunch of stuffing for the pants. I have my own stuffing for the pants. (Read that as you will, but I was mostly talking about the backside.)

White collar shirts are easy to clean because you can just bleach the shit out of them and hang them up to dry.

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Just sitting here today. I took tomorrow off. I have too many things on my mind at once and it’s left me unable to focus on any singular thing. Will have to fight out of this, again.

This is why I shouldn’t drink very much. The next day I can feel my chemistry out of whack and I’m a dark cloud. Pallbearer on the iTunes. Where’s this goddamn thunderstorm.